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3/12/10:
9 Days in Paradise Entry #7 - Haleakala, Hana, Hale Kai
I woke
at 4 a.m., not setting an alarm and I just knew: it was a clear, gorgeous
day, perfect for seeing the sunrise at Haleakala. So I grabbed my camera
and parka (it's cold up there!) and headed out. Just in time, too. After
the 36 miles to Haleakala (the last 22 on twisty but well-maintained
roads) I got to the summit at 5:20; sunrise would be at 6:30. I was
able to find a parking spot (one of two left at the summit), make my
way up the stairs to the observatory in pitch dark (no flashlight!)
and take my place at the crater's rim. Then we waited. In the cold,
winds sometimes gusting up to 40 mph, but usually 5-10, much milder
than the previous few days. The summit was dark and crowded, but hushed.
Some people huddled inside the observatory, which had shelter from the
winds, but I didn't want a piece of glass between me and the sunrise
when it finally came.
Nothing
I can write here can express the beauty of these moments. I'll let the
photos speak for themselves (larger versions are just a click away).
More later
about Hana and Hale Kai.
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3/11/10:
9 Days in Paradise Entry #6 - Yoga, The Search for Sun
I spent
today (Day 5, 3/11/10) looking for sun. After another hot yoga session
(this one not as much fun -- new instructor) I showered and looked for
sunshine. I started in Wailuku, drove to Lahaina and passed beautiful
sunny beaches on the way. Assuming my usual beach in Honokawai (which
is always sunny, it seems) would be there for me, I drove on to that
old hang out only to find it raining hard. I actually bought a sweatshirt!
So I bought
mai tai fixings (I'm going to a pupu party tomorrow night) and unloaded
at the hostel, then drove to Kihei where I was able to catch a beautiful
2 hours in the sun at Kamaole Beach, one of three with that name.
I listened
to my mediatation CD while sitting in the sunshine and taking in the
great Maui breezes.
When I
returned to the hostel, I made a practice round of Mai tais and shared
them with several of the hostel members.
I found
that I can Skype and stay in touch with home that way. The wonders of
technology!
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3/10/10:
9 Days in Paradise Entry #5 - Cameras and Cars
I spent
yesterday (Day 3, 3/9/10) looking for a rental car, a camera and a cell
phone. I started with the car. The hostel provides a list of car rental
companies, so I started with one within walking distance,"Universal
Motors." They didn't answer their phone, so I walked over there.
They didn't answer their door, and a sign on the door said, "If
this door is locked, check for us out back, or phone us." I checked
out back. No one was there. Where in the universe was Universal Motors,
anyway?
So I hoofed
it back to the hostel, and placed a call to another local company, who
will provide a shuttle. I'd checked online, and had found pricing for
a week at around $140 plus tax and service fees for a week. This place
quoted me $190. I said I'd found better pricing online, and they offered
to drop it to $180. I said I would get back to them if I couldn't find
a better deal. Eventually I went through Priceline, named my own price
and got a car for $137 including taxes and service fees. But I had to
pick it up at the airport. Maui public transport leaves a lot to be
desired. Kahalui is only 2 miles away, but the airport is another 2
1/2, and I was still pretty stiff and sore from the hike. As I was walking
to breakfast (or an early lunch: by now it was 11:30), I ran into my
friends from England, Helen & Rachel. They'd already checked out
of the hostel on their way to Kihei, but had stopped to get a bite before
leaving, and offered to give me a ride to the airport. Perfect! I got
my car, and went into Lahaina in search of a camera. My digital camera,
which had been hobbling along for a couple of months, finally gave up
the ghost. I brought it to a camera shop in Lahaina and was told it
was an electrical problem and I'd have to return it to the manufacturer
(Nikon). They offered to sell me another for $179. I got one at Walgreens
for $99.
Today (Day
4, 3/10/10) I decided to try Bikram yoga, aka "hot yoga" to
see if I could loosen up my tight muscles from my hike. I drove in to
Kahalui for the class, taught at an Indian School of Yoga. My instructor,
Lucia, checked me in and I joined 20 other hardy souls in a room that
smelled a lot like sweaty dogs. The guy in front of me was wearing a
Speedo. He was in good shape, but no one looks good in a Speedo, especially
doing yoga poses. The floor was covered with a straw mat, and we each
had towels over our yoga mats to catch the dripping sweat from the 26
poses we would each do twice. At 105 degrees, there was plenty of sweat.
The class was 90 minutes long, and somehow I managed to keep up and
only felt like I was going to pass out a couple of times. I did feel
better afterwards, looser. Then it was a quick shower, change of clothes,
and back in the car.
My next
drive was to Haleakala. I planned to do the sunrise tomorrrow, which
involves leaving the hostel by 4 a.m. and driving 36 miles, the last
22 of which are twisty, windy (both types of windy if you get my drift)
and steep. I was driving through clouds at 6,000 feet elevation, and
the climb to the top would be another 4,000. I wanted to do a dry run,
so I'd have a better feel for where I was going in the dark. But there
was no "dry" run. The wipers were on most of the way. When
I got there, visibility was poor. It was still raining, not hard, but
there were winds gusting up to 60 mph. The park ranger who'd let me
in said that yesterday's winds were up to 90 mph. I am questioning the
sanity of driving that road in the dark (I don't see well at night,
even with my glasses) for the slim chance I will see ANYTHING when I
get there. I'm pretty sure my children would rather I came home alive.
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3/8/10:
9 Days in Paradise Entry #4 - New Friends; The Game's Afoot
When I
first checked in to the hostel, Scott, the manager, recommended Monday
night at the Marc Aurel Cafe for "Open Mike Night." I intended
to go, and did. I decided to be brave and read one of my short stories.
But what I found when I arrived was that it was really a musician's
night. There was a local band playing, and new musicians arrived and
played in 15-minute increments. So I stayed and watched the music, leaving
my essay in my backpack. I was hit upon by one of the musicans, so I
was grateful when two ladies called me to their table on the patio.
They introduced themselves as Helen and Rachel, mother and daughter
from the northeast of England. They are on a 6 1/2 month holiday, and
have rented out their house to finance a large portion of the trip.
We had great conversation, shared lots of laughs, and they were kind
enough to listen to my essay (I read for them in private) and they laughed
in all the right places.
But something
disturbing happened before I left for dinner. Just before 8 p.m., I
was grabbing items off the twin bed in my room when I noticed a lighter.
I don't smoke, and the lighter was definitely not there when I checked
in. So that meant someone had been in my room. I checked my valuables:
laptop, two cameras, wallet. Nothing missing. After getting back from
open mike, I approached Garrett, at the hostel, who went to Scott's
room and interrupted him from his evening off. Scott, being the manager,
took the matter very seriously. On his watch there has never been a
theft at the hostel. He and Garrett came to my room, interviewed me,
and Scott began piecing together a timetable of opportunity. None of
the staff smoked, so that narrowed it down to guests. He's on the case,
and I'm alerted, so I don't expect any more oddities. However, when
I was at dinner at the cafe, the young Irishman I met who'd been Internet
surfing, came in looking for his wallet. He'd lost it somewhere and
was retracing his steps. I told him about the lighter. He didn't connect
the dots, so maybe it's nothing. It's probably nothing. But still. A
bit of intrigue on the island.
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3/8/10:
9 Days in Paradise Entry #3 - When Things Go Wrong, they Go Right
At the
Marc Aurel cafe I had the most delicious yogurt with blueberries, strawberries
and granola I've ever had, and met a lovely man named Warren, 73 years
young, who has lived on Maui all his life. He's never actually stepped
foot off it! He told me about seeing a tsunami in 1946 when he was in
grade school. Warren introduced me to Doug, a writer, who was busy plunking
away on his laptop on the patio of the cafe. I glanced down at what
Doug was writing and a word caught my eye: sartori, which means
"enlightenment" and "a glimpse of the Divine." It's
the second time I've seen that word in two days: the first was yesterday
in a book I was reading on the plane called Zero Limits, by Joe
Vitale. Doug is a chiropractor slash writer slash life coach and will
be certified soon as a Radical Forgiveness coach and therapist. I asked
him if he knew about Ho'oponopono, the Hawaiian practice of forgiveness
and transmutation, and while he'd heard of it, it is different from
what he is working on.
I then
hiked up to the Iao Valley Highway, which leads to the Iao (pronounced
ee-AH-oh) Valley State Park. Warren warned me, "don't get wet"
and while it sprinkled, it wasn't cold or bothersome until about a mile
or so into the walk. Then it started pouring. I ducked into the shelter
of a public building along the side of the road. When the rain let
up, I learned that I was in the most beautiful
park. The first thing I saw was a building
with beautiful tile work around one
window. That led to a courtyard
with the Virgin Mary, then a bridge
and concrete pagoda. Yes,
boys, I walked over the bridge. Here's
proof. And here are some koi
I saw there. Here's a photo of me at a wood
pagoda. The thing is, if it were not for the rain, I could easily
have walked right past this park. It's not visible from the street,
at least not the ornate buildings and courtyard. One thing I've learned
lately is to look at problems as opportunities. Thank you, Maui, for
the rain.
Later I
made it to the Iao Valley State Park,
after being hit with another rainshower. I learned quickly that trees
make better shelter than shrubs. By the time I got to the park I was
pretty wet, and the wind had picked up considerably. I wasn't cold though;
this is Maui. Luckily I'd brought a towel to dry off with, an extra
pair of shoes and socks (I didn't need them, and my hiking boots worked
out great: no blisters). Here is the Needle,
a rock formation. And here I am,
drowned rat: even in the shelter
it was wet.
The Iao
Valley is beautiful: waterfalls, gorgeous
vegetation and of course the rock formations.
The hike
back was mostly dry with just enough wind to blow dry my clothes. I
was pretty muscle-sore so after a quick shower, quick lunch at the cleverly
named "Cafe O'Lei" (kalua pork quesadilla and a glass of white
wine for medicinal purposes only) I had the best massage of my life
at the Green Ti Boutique and Massage. Then I finally mailed my bills.
It's been a magical day and it's not over yet. Stay tuned for further
developments!
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3/8/10:
9 Days in Paradise Entry #2 - Insomnia in Paradise
I was still
on Portland time last night, so the two-hour difference and travel and
getting little sleep the night before combined to make for an early-to-bed-philosophy.
But the Oscars were on last night and the TV in the community room of
the hostel was loud and blaring. Quiet time is 10 p.m. around here but
it is loosely enforced. At some point the TV just went off, with no
warning to the viewers, but I think the show was over by then. Then
there was boisterous talking, and I imagine I drifted off around midnight,
only to wake again at 4 a.m. It was raining, and the metal roof and
open louvers make a cacophony of sounds, some soothing, some jarring.
I could hear other residents stirring so I got up and met a young man
from Ireland surfing the Net and a retired woman who will be here for
another month and who pointed me to coffee, which is available around
the clock here. I've noticed that in Maui, the rain usually comes at
night, and leaves in the morning, almost like the island wants people
to enjoy their day, so it quenches its thirst when everyone's asleep.
Now at 6:30 a.m. it's clearing and I only hear birdsong and the sounds
of traffic from nearby Market Street. I plan to try a local cafe for
breakfast, then hike to the I'ao Valley State Park, a 3-mile jaunt each
way, so sleeping should pose little problem tonight.
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3/7/10:
9 Days in Paradise Entry #1 - To Kill a Nene? (Aloha from Hawaii)
The tsunami
was a no-show in Maui, which is just as well. I'm here and it's beautiful:
breezy, low hanging clouds but otherwise sunny and warm. Other than
a few definite plans for these 9 days (a bit of work, sunrise at Haleakala,
hiking), I'm trying to go with the flow (hey, if I can't do that in
Maui, where can I?) I left without my cell phone, which was a complete
accident, but which my sister says was my subconscious mind's way of
giving myself some chill.
I arrived
at 1 p.m. and was picked up at the airport by Kevin, a driver for the
shuttle van driven on an infrequent, unpredictable schedule by staffers
at the Wailuku hostel where I'm staying. It was actually Kevin's day
off but he was nice enough to pinch hit for Scott, who was staffing
the front desk unaided, it being housekeeping's day off. It was a 10-minute
drive to Wailuku from Kahalui. The hostel has a private entrance down
a narrow alley buffered by tall
buildings and a huge banyan tree. Kevin punched in a code that's
probably not been changed in 20 years to get
us into the building, then I schlepped my bags up one flight of
stairs where I met Scott, the manager, who looks like a younger version
a of ZZ Top band member. After a cursory and somewhat abrupt tour during
which Scott told me everything I needed to know about the hostel, Wailuku,
bus schedules and laundry instructions without stopping once for a breath,
Scott handed me the key to A15, my private "suite." I have
a double bed, a single bed, a closet and a nightstand. But it's clean
and just two doors down from the best of one of the hostel's four bathrooms.
The front desk closes from 2-5 for "siesta" which I assume
is surfing time for the staffers.
I walked
around Wailuku for a bit, but most of the shops were closed, this being
Sunday. I was looking for a drop box for my bills, which I had sorted
and paid while waiting for the plane from Portland, but no luck. I ended
up catching a local theater production of To Kill a Mockingbird.
It was well acted, but hearing those deep southern accents in the Iao
Theater seemed a little incongruous.
Aloha!
More tomorrow.
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2/27/10:
Tsunami Me
I'm scheduled
to head to Maui next week, and today they're expecting the biggest tsunami
since 1964. I tried to contact the residents of the condo I usually
stay at, but I'm assuming they are well on their way to high, dry land.
At least I hope so. The complex is right on the beach. The earthquake
causing the tsunami has been measured out in the Pacific at 800-900
times more powerful than the Haitian earthquake.
I planned
on staying a bit inland this time, and those plans have not changed.
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2/9/10:
A Blogger Off the Old Block
My son
Sam now has his own art blog, appropriately titled, "Sam's
art blog." He's a prolific and talented artist, and produces
between 5 and 10 new post-worthy illustrations per day. This is destined
to be the most frequently updated blog in history. Now if I can just
teach him how to ftp, we'll be in business.
Sam takes
his art, and his blogging in stride. When I told him he had 29 subscribers
to his other Web site, KidsDigDinos.com,
where his dinosaur drawings are posted, he said, "That's great!
What are we having for dinner?"
From the
dinosaur site, Sam has two pen pals, Laura and Whitney, both from Canada.
Like mother, like son.
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2/8/10:
Laughing Across the Border
I have
a new friend. His name is Doug and he's the funniest man I've never
met. He lives in Calgary and we're pen pals. We would never have known
about each other had it not been for the Internet. We exchange war stories,
movie reviews, and share our love of Hawaii, our hatred of the cold,
and our inability
to figure out members of the opposite sex. He'd been chastising me for
not knowing that PEI stood for Prince Edward Island. I then told him
I assumed Canada was just another American colony, and besides that,
we have Hawaii going for us. Here's his reply (Doug has a bias against
apostrophes, so you won't see many of them. I mean "you wont see
many of them."
Yes we
are a colony of the good ol' United States of Merica. But we're not
the same...
Your
economy hits the skids, our takes a major dip but we somehow think
loading every man, woman and child with 1.6 TRILLION dollars in national
debt is, well... absolutely freaking insanity! $1,600,000,000.00 Thats
a lotta zeros.
You produce
three million crappy movies in Hollywood every year. We watch them
all. We make 9 movies a year. Eight of them are funded by the government
and they're about buffalo. You dont see any of them. Neither does
anyone here.
You have
celebrities. We have celebrities. But you think our celebrities are
your celebrities and when they get really famous they move to the
US anyway even though they maintain they "will always be a Canadian
at heart" (eg. Michael J Fox, Celine Dion, William Shatner, Jim
Carrey, Keanu Reeves, Dan Akroyd, Mike Myers, Kiefer Sutherland...
blah, blah,
blah) We're still pissy about that.
You have
an election and its on our frickin' TV sets 24/7 for an entire "please
just shoot me now if I have to watch another minute of this"
year leading up to election day. We have an election, you dont even
know. Its not even on page 6 of the newspapers. We could elect a baboon
and it MIGHT be on the Daily Show as long as Lady Gaga isnt wearing
a new dress that day.
We all
know who are your freakin' President is. Every single person in Canada
knows. You dont even know that we dont have a president. We have a
Prime Minister. And you definitely dont know his name, nor could you
name one past Prime Minister.
You elect
movie stars and even wrestlers to be governors. We just think thats
hilarious. And we dont wonder why California is bankrupt. What, a
muscular Austrian actor who specializes in being 'robot man' up isnt
a great fiscal manager? WHO would have guessed that?
After
9/11 you think everyone hates you so some doofus tries to light his
underwear and WE have to tighten our security to the point of lunacy.
Your
banks fail and your government says, well, we cant have that, and
gives them BILLIONS of dollars of YOUR money. Our banks have rules
that dont allow them to give money out to people who cant pay it back.
We thought that up all by ourselves.
Yes,
you DO have Hawaii. But only because you needed a military base in
the mid Pacific after WWII. We only have two naval vessels and one
of them gives harbor tours to senior citizens in Victoria. We dont
need an island. I dont think our other boat is big enough to get there
anyway.
Not without three more guys rowing.
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1/28/10:
A Word Ahead of Its Time
A word
came across my path recently: illuminous. The editor in me said,
"That's not a word." I typed it in my word processing program
and saw the telltale red zigzag line beneath it, getting my confirmation.
Then I looked at several online dictionaries. I found it in one with
the definition, "clear and bright."
So it's
not a word, but it's becoming a word.
Sometimes
words like illuminous, which sound like the words illuminate
and luminous, start out as errors and end up in the dictionary.
The early days of word usage might be a good time to purchase its URL.
I recently sold a URL for $1300. Not bad for a $10 investment.
I looked
up "illuminous.com" and it was already taken. Clearly, someone
was brighter than I.
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1/22/10:
Too Young for Class?
I heard
DJs talking yesterday about Conan O'Brien. They complained that they'd
heard from the Y generation that anyone who "didn't get" Conan
was probably too old. Hogwash. Taste and decency shouldn't have an age
limit.
Conan O'Brien
was foul, low-brow and, at times, disgusting. His brand of humor never
rose to the class of Jay Leno, and certainly not Johnny Carson. What
NBC was thinking when they replaced Leno for him is still a mystery.
And now that he's off the show (with a $45 million severance), Jay will
be back, and Conan's reign will be remembered like something that rises
up from your stomach after too much Mexican food: unexpected, distasteful,
and then gone.
Recently
I mentioned in front of three twenty-somethings that I wanted to see
the movie, It's Complicated, starring Meryl Streep and Steve
Martin. They groaned. "That's like a chick flick for older women,"
one of them said, managing to look arrogant even while wearing Lycra.
I saw
the movie with a friend. It was hysterically funny. As we exited the
theater at 10:30 p.m. a long line of Y-genners sat waiting on the January-cold
cement hoping to buy tickets to Avatar. I wanted to say to them
as we passed by, "Cartoon flick for 20-somethings," but I
held my tongue.
We older
people have more class. I can't explain why. It's complicated.
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1/21/10:
Birthing a Book
Many a
writer has said that publishing a book is a like having a baby. You
spend nine months or more "cooking" it, loving it, totally
absorbed by it, and then you let it out into the world.
Today I
gave the fourth (and nearly final) draft of the manuscript for my nonfiction
book, Mom and Dad, Can I Have the Keys to the Universe? to a
member of my mastermind group. Next week I will also share it with three
other members of my review team. And the thing is, I'm not worried if
they'll like my baby. What I'm worried about is: is my baby as ready
as it can be for the public? I don't want it to just get good reviews,
I want it to do what I created it for: help parents teach their children
how to create amazing lives, for themselves and for the betterment of
our world.
Then again,
this book was conceived in magical, mystical Maui, so I have great faith
it will live up to its promise.
For the
kiddos (age 11-16) I'm creating a seminar called I Can Do Anything.
It will bring the principles of the book alive for them by using language
and examples from their world. No translator needed. That's a tall order,
but I have a great test market in my own household.
Once in
a while the planets align, and your passion and your profession are
one and the same. This is one of those times. I'm as high as I've been
in a long time. Oooh baby.
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1/18/10:
A Man for the Times, A Message Worth Remembering
Dr. Martin
Luther King, Jr. endured much during his widely recognized reign as
civil rights leader. He was jailed 20 times, stabbed in the chest, his
family's house was fire bombed, and there were numerous threats on his
life. He spoke for those who had no voice, and because of that, he was
alternately idolized and vilified. After his assassination it took more
than 15 years of Congressional debate before a national holiday was
named in his honor. By the time the national holiday was declared many
states had already been celebrating it on their own for years.
Today is
not just a day off of work, it is a day of remembrance. And while we're
remembering, here are a few things that may have been forgotten:
- Martin
Luther King, Jr. graduated high school and entered college at age
15
- By age
20 he was an ordained minister
- By age
26 he had his doctorate
- In 1964
(at age 35) he became the youngest person ever to win the Nobel Peace
Prize
- He was
only the second American to have a national holiday named after him
(George Washington was first)
When he
helped lead the demonstration in Birmingham that led to one of his incarcerations,
he did so at the invitation of local civil rights leaders at a time
when that city was perhaps the most widely segregated in the U.S., with
a record of brutality, unsolved bombings of black homes and churches,
and unjust treatment of blacks in the courts. At the time of his arrest
both black and white clergy in Birmingham wrote protest letters against
the demonstration, and said that Dr. King, being from Atlanta, had no
business stirring up trouble in Birmingham.
Part of
the letter Dr. King wrote in response to his detractors included the
now famous phrase, "Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice
everywhere."
It takes
courage to speak out against entrenched power; it takes courage to speak
out for justice. Especially today, we should all remember to do more
of it.
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1/15/10:
A New Year, A New Decade, A New Name, A Clean Slate
Yesterday
I filed the papework to have my name legally changed. No, I'm not becoming
Dharma Teacher Brilliant Dharma Grains, the Buddhist translation
for my first and last name. And I'm not, as I'd originally thought,
taking back my maiden name: Yvonne Meacham. Instead, I'm adopting
my middle name as my last name. Why I didn't think of this earlier,
I'll never know. But since I made that decision, I've come to learn
that at least two other women I know have done the same thing.
I've never
been fond of my maiden name, and although I liked my former married
name, Buchanan, it was never my name. I kept it after
my divorce only for the sake of my sons who are now old enough not to
care what I call myself, as long as they can still call me Mom.
So sometime
after my court hearing Feb. 25, I will officially be Yvonne Aileen
(yuh-VONN ay-LEEN). Yvonne = "yew" and Aileen = "light."
I love both of those meanings.
I realized
the other day, when I was speaking to a friend, that changing my name
has definite advantages. I have a whole new slate on which to write
the rest of my life. While Yvonne Buchanan (and even Yvonne Meacham)
may have made some mistakes in the past: in business, in relationships,
in life, Yvonne Aileen hasn't made any!
Yvonne
Aileen has never let herself down when it comes to keeping a workout
schedule. Yvonne Aileen has never taken a job that was beneath her,
hidden aspects of her personality to keep the approval of her mate,
starved herself on the Lemonade Diet, or bought an article of clothing
she never wore. She has never had a speeding ticket, a parking ticket,
or sat through a boring meeting when what she most wanted to do was
run straight through the back wall, leaving an opening in the shape
of her fleeing body, like they do in cartoons. Yvonne Aileen has never
had an angry exchange with her children, or set a goal for herself she
didn't meet. Yvonne Aileen has never been so afraid of losing someone
she loved that she held her tongue when she should have spoken out.
She has never forgotten an appointment, a friend's birthday or the name
of anyone she's ever met.
In short:
Yvonne Aileen rocks!
Yes, the
other Yvonnes did share in some incredible memories. And the good news
is, Yvonne Aileen gets to keep them, too. But starting a New Year and
a new decade with a clean slate, with one less name to carry around,
with names that I truly love and that have belonged to me since birth,
wow. This is a gift I gladly and gratefully give myself.
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1/13/10:
Would You Clean Up My Vomit?
I've been
reading lately. A lot. Part of is research for a project I'm working
on, part of it is serendipity. A book leapt off the shelf yesterday
when I was at Powell's and landed in my arms. I was there to get two
books on publishing and a book by Bruce Lipton called Spontaneous
Evolution, all three recommended by my amazing business coach, Kim
George. But the book that leapt into my arms was Miracle in Maui.
In this
book, Paul Pearsall, Ph.D., a clinical and educational psychologist,
wrote about his own miraculous healing in a bone marrow transplant ward,
a place where death walked the halls like a tireless janitor, and patients
endured pain most animals would not have tolerated: marrow removal,
treatment and replacement, whole-body radiation, and burning, poisonous
chemotherapy. During Dr. Pearsall's nearly two years of treatment, his
wife, Celest, stood by him, often sleeping at his bedside. The nurses,
the doctors, even one new doctor who had been dubbed "Dr. Death
Vader" due to his pessimism, all remarked on the magnetic warmth
they could feel, and the glow they could at times actually see between
Pearsall and his wife. Their love created an energy that was palpable
and visible.
One patient
in the ward confided to Pearsall that he had had many affairs during
his lifetime, all of which were exciting, but he knew that none of his
lovers would have stayed with him through his treatment, cleaned up
his vomit.
I have
been lucky to have loved someone that much. And as I begin to re-enter
the dating world after a four-year hiatus, I will use this question
as a litmus test before I commit to a "relationship." Is he
someone I would do that for? Would he do that for me?
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1/7/10:
Shift Happens
The movement
of the earth's tectonic plates has caused the formation and break-up
of the earth's continents over time, including occasional formation
of a supercontinent that contains most or all of the continents. Then
these supercontinents break up again.
Why am
I telling you all of this? Because this is NOTHING compared to the shifts
that have been going on in my life lately. Ever since the beginning
of the New Year, major movement has been shaking up my career, my relationships,
and my financial and physical wellbeing. Some of these changes have
been good, some have been friggin' awesome, and some have been heartbreakingly
painful.
All of
it has been necessary.
Shift happens.
And when it does, we either embrace it or we curl up into a little ball
and cry. I've done a little of both.
* Part
of this process will even be changing my name (stay tuned for further
developments).
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12/31/09: Auld Lang Syne
Did you
ever wonder what auld lang syne actually meant?
"Auld
Lang Syne" is the title of a Scottish poem written by Robert Burns
in 1788, which later became a folk song. The title means "old long
since", which makes no "since" at all, so a better translation
might be "days gone by."
As we herald
in the New Year, we're also saying goodbye to the old one. I say: good
riddance! I am a very upbeat person, most people would agree. I've
even been called Pollyanna at times. But 2009? It sucked wind. That's
Scottish for "sucked wind." Which may explain the bagpipes.
So without
further haggis, my last Scottish joke of the year:
A bagpipe
player parked at a busy shopping mall. With some trepidation, he left
his bagpipes in plain view in the back seat, locking all four doors,
and nervously sprinted through his shopping errands. Twenty minutes
later he returned, breathless and sweaty. Sure enough, all his windows
had been broken, and four more sets of bagpipes were in his back seat.

May
the blessed sunlight shine on you like a great peat fire, so that stranger
and friend may come and warm himself at it. And may light shine out
of the two eyes of you, like a candle set in the window of a house,
bidding the wanderer come in out of the storm. And may the blessing
of the rain be on you, may it beat upon your Spirit and wash it fair
and clean, and leave there a shining pool where the blue of Heaven shines,
and sometimes a star.
-- Scottish blessing
Have
a surprising, adventure-driven, white-hot passionate, bagpipe-less (unless,
like me, you're into that sort of thing) New Year.
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12/7/09: Aloha
I'm in
Maui again: second time in a month, this time solo. Traveling alone,
without the encumbrances of high-energy children gives me time to ...
work. Work? In paradise? Yes, unfortunately, or fortunately. It's a
great field test for my eventual move to Maui (one day): can I actually
get work done when the sky is blue, the surf frothy and untamed, the
palm trees swaying gently, and the breeze tinged with tuberose? Um,
yeah, sort of.
There have
been many warm and wonderful distractions, but I've actually written
17,000 words of a book, sent numerous business emails, and am tackling
two articles on assignment today about (get ready for the excitement)
the practicality of membership buying clubs. I will probably make enough
from those two articles to pay for my grocery bill: $8.09 for a dozen
(albeit organic) eggs! I think I need a membership buying club.
But the
price I will pay for enjoying this time in paradise will not be in the
green stuff. It will be in the wrenching emotions of leaving in a few
days. Maui is home to me. When I was asked by a surfer recently if I
lived here I answered, "Yes, as often as I can."
Happy Birthday,
Everett (71 years young yesterday)!
Aloha,
A hui hou.
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10/20/09: Just in Time for Halloween, I Meet a Real Monster
I met a
monster recently. Under five feet tall, she was a successful businesswoman
with simian features and an unfortunate haircut. She shook my world.
When you surround yourself with loving, generative people, monsters
can get the sneak on you because you forget they're out there.
But I learned some valuable lessons: I learned to trust my gut. I learned
that I would never trade my beautiful life for any amount of material
success. And I learned that all chaos is merely a time of transition
to a new and better place.
"I was sitting in a sea of pity, not noticing that the winds
of heaven were carrying me across the skies."
This passage was read to me quite by "accident" in the midst
of the chaos, catching me just before I tumbled into the abyss, setting
me back on solid ground.
When you find yourself facing a monster, be happy that you're not one!
And know that life is a beautiful journey, and that sometimes it takes
monsters to show us the way.
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8/22/09:
Happy Birthday Bro!
People
say that having children ages you. I disagree. When I see my two sons
growing, all I feel is proud of the way they're turning out. Their energy
keeps me young. What ages me is seeing my BABY BROTHER turn 40
today!
I remember
when he arrived at our grandmother's house, fresh from the hospital,
all 10 pounds, 13 oz. of him, nothing but golf ball cheeks and poopy
diapers, and I thought he was my personal animated doll. I fed him,
changed him, held him and dressed him in girly clothes because he couldn't
do anything about it.
Happy
Birthday, Timmy. (I'm one of five people left alive who are still
allowed to call him that.)
Love,
Your Sis Yvonne
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5/7/09: Too Busy to Blog? ....
"I've
got 20 seconds while my coffee is reheating. Great! I can use that time
to go to the bathroom!" This was an actual thought that ran through
my head today.
I just
finished a 42-page Web site (check it out at Access
Feng Shui) which included editing and creating close to 80 images.
It's the [fill in the blank, I've lost count] th Web site I have
created in the last three months. My world is a self-imposed whirwind,
and today I learned an important lesson:
S
- L - O - W D - O - W - N
I
got this message in a brilliant flash of light as I went through an
orange-turning-red signal at NE 39th and Sandy. Yep, my picture, with
morning hair, sans make-up, wearing my sweats, and probably mouthing
a word I try never to say in front of my children is now being developed
by a machine that will bill me $300+ for the privilege.
Today
I should be editing an e-book manuscript (and I will get to it!!!) or
interviewing three family business owners in various U.S. locations
for an article that's due in 4 days about the state of the economy.
I will get to that too. Or putting together 100 women to become muses
on my soon-to-be-launching 800Muses.com Web site. Ahem. For the launch
in 3 weeks! I will get to it ...
Instead
I'm taking three hours out of the whirlwind to attend a Mother's Day
luncheon at my son's school. If I had a job where I only worked 8 hours
a day, I probably couldn't make it.
Ohmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.
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4/23/09: Why I Think Twittering is for the Birds
I'm Linked
In but I don't Twitter. I accidentally joined once and forgot about
it, and came back and found out I had about a thousand messages from
the same person who probably wonders why I never responded. I joined
Facebook, after much prompting from several friends, for exactly 15
minutes before I bailed. Too much sign-my-high-school-year-book type
of energy.
For business
reasons I did join an online networking group for entrepreneurs, but
it pales in comparison to my real, live networking group that meets
twice a month. We meet in person, where we can look into each other's
eyes and laugh out loud, not like this: <LOL>.
Social
media has become social mania. Everyone's doing it, even Oprah. For
me, that may be just enough reason not to do it. Maybe I'm behind the
times, maybe I'm ahead of the curve. All I know is that reading and
responding and deleting my e-mail takes enough time out of my day without
having to do it at a half-dozen sites.
I don't
want to join an "online community" to talk to my friends.
And although I love them, I really don't care what my friends had for
breakfast or what sandwich they're dreaming about for lunch. To me,
"community" is comprised of the people you see eye-to-eye
and talk to voice-to-voice and share an actual sandwich with. Pass the
mustard, please.
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4/8/09: Will You Be My Beta Tester?
It's not
as romantic as a valentine, I know. I just launched my fourth site in
less than 4 weeks, and this one is way over my head. I mean, WAYYYY over.
I never thought Max, my 10-year-old, would be able to say "I Told
You So" this early in life, but he was right: Yu-Gi-Oh! is a complicated,
strategic game that's teaching him how to think in 12 dimensions.
As someone
who has trouble enough with the standard three dimensions, I'd like your
help. If you're a Yu-Gi-Oh! buff (and even if you're not) please beta
test this newest site:
Yu-Gi-Oh
MAX!
Let me know
if I've got any broken links, images that don't load, etc. I'll have Max
check it for Yu-Gi-Oh! accuracy. After all, he's the expert.
Thanks,
Yvonne
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3/19/09: Web Site #3, Autism Answers Now
I've just
launched the third Web site in three days. This one is a resource site
for families whose child has just received an autism diagnosis. Included
are books I found helpful, a link to my own family's story about autism,
and answers to early questions about diet, supplements, and therapies.
The site
is designed to answer the questions: what
is autism, and what are some autism treatments? and to provide hope
where there was none.
My personal
belief is that autism, the "new breed" of autism that is sweeping
our country is nothing more than environmental damage, be it toxins in
our environment, poor diet, mercury-containing vaccines, or a combination
of these, combined with some sort of genetic predisposition. I'm not alone
in believing this, and hopefully some day there will be better, more complete
answers. Until then, I'll do my best to answer those questions I can.
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Photo
from our new site, Autism Answers
Now.
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3/18/09: Dino-Mite Happenings
I'm becoming
an e-publisher! Very exciting. Check out my first joint venture (with
my lovely son, Sam), Kids Dig Dinos.com,
a dinoaurs for kids site.
You'll also
find my epublisher site,
Knowledge Base Publishing here.
So ... what
will I publish? Ebooks with informative or entertaining, but certainly
niche and evergreen value (topics of interest that will be around for
a long time).
Any questions,
see the Knowledge Base site, or just ask!
The future
is very very bright with a Christmas ribbon on top!
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3/6/09: 10 Great Things About a Sucky Economy
1. Store
clerks are much friendlier, especially those who work on commission
2. Better
customer service all around
3. Coupon
clipping has become a lot more exciting
4. You don't
have to take that stinky job because guess what: no job!
5. More time
with the family (see #4 above)
6. Opportunities
abound, really! Anytime there's a shakeup, winners rise to the top. Be
a winner.
7. Suddenly,
EVERYTHING'S ON SALE!
8. The library
is warmer because it's more crowded
9. More people
are returning bottles
10. We all
have time to focus on what really matters. To re-coin a phrase, It's
not the economy, stupid.
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2/16/09:
Presidents and King George
Happy President's
Day. Recently my eldest son, Max, performed in his fifth grade play, a
musical pageant called "Ring Out the Bells of Freedom." Max
was fortunate to be given the juicy role of King George III, enabling
him to deliver such spicy lines as "Balderdash!" and "Bloody
rubbish!"
Today being
President's Day, and given the recent historic election of our nation's
president, it may be prudent to look at how history treated King George
III. Wikipedia reports that historical analysis of the King's life has
gone through a "kaleidoscope of changing views depending heavily
on the prejudices of his biographers and the sources available to them."
In my son's pageant, King George was depicted as a tyrant who was uncooperative
with the colonists. In other historical references, he is looked on as
very cooperative with the colonists, albeit for his own power-enhancing
reasons.
The writers
of our history have a responsibility to get it right, and if they present
something with bias, to disclose it within the same document. Long after
the man (or woman) is gone, the written word lives on. May the biographers
of President Obama's tenure be fair, accurate and prejudice-free. And
may our country continue to Ring Out the Bells of Freedom for our children,
our children's children, and for all the generations to come.
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2/10/09: Whales, Rays and Other Sea Creatures
I'm in Maui,
thoroughly enjoying my second trip here in three months, feeling very
lucky and spoiled. This time around is whale season, and we can see them
spouting and breaching in the distance, even from the grounds of our condo.
Yesterday
we snorkeled, and in addition to a nice variety of fish, we saw a manta
ray, perhaps 5 feet wide and 9 feet long. It was just laying there beneath
us, on the sandy ocean floor. We hovered at a safe distance, then as we
began to move away, the ray lifted off the bottom and, with a few graceful
sweeps of its body, swam away.
Today I go
on an eco whale watching tour, hoping to see up close what we've been
seeing from the beach for the past several days.There's something about
the beauty and majesty of large sea creatures like the ray and the whale
that makes me wonder which is the more intelligent creature: the one who
tries to master and tame its environment, or the one that moves through
it with dignity, accepting what is.
In my next
life I'll be a crew member on the Calypso. For now I've joined the Pacific
Whale Foundation. It's the least I can do for Ray and Friends.
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1/29/09: Writing for Human Beings
I was reading
through a user manual recently and found myself reading the same paragraph
147 times. What is it about some tech writers that makes them think they
have to write for computers rather than people? A good writer, techie
or otherwise, doesn't try to use all their vocabulary in one sentence.
Babe, save that for the college term papers. Good writers use words that
don't require the reader to break out their secret decoder ring.
In graduate
school we studied the Plain English Movement. The Movement was an attempt
by the government a couple of decades ago to clear away the high-fog factor
in governmental and legal documents. It failed miserably. Apparently,
some government workers and lawyers like it foggy. Fog provides job security
because: (1) they've got the decoder rings, and (2) they can alter the
interpretation depending on weather, mood, or how much they stand to gain
from a particular interpretation.
A good writer,
and especially a technical one, conveys information, something that only
happens when the audience can understand what's being read. No decoder
ring required.
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1/10/09:
Shaping Up after 40
I'm on a
major shape-up bent lately, and I'm loving it! I guess you could call
it a New Year's resolution but I started 12/30. (I'm early for everything,
so no surprise there.)
Like everyone
else on the planet, I have tried just about every diet out there to lose
that last 10 (and later, 20 pounds): Jenny Craig, Slim Fast, Nutrisystem,
Weight Watchers, LA Weight Loss, Isagenix, and all the fad diets: the
9-day diet, the cabbage soup diet, the banana and hamburger diet, cleanses,
fasts. I've hired personal trainers, joined a gym, bought the equipment,
bought the clothes. If I had all the money I've spent on quick fixes and
accessories I could afford major body surgery. There's a quick fix.
But this
time is different. There's a lot to be said for reaching 40-something
beyond the slower metabolism. You get a little wiser. By then you've learned
how to create a plan and stick to it. And you've learned that, outside
of the operating room, there's no such thing as a quick fix that's also
lasting. So I'm doing it right. I'm working with my metabolism instead
of against it, eating right, drinking 8 glasses of water a day (it's really
easy once you're in the habit), exercising 6 days a week, incorporating
strength training, educating myself on the subject, and not expecting
overnight results. I don't weigh myself daily or even weekly. Every 4
weeks is my plan. This way I won't be discouraged by temporary fluctuations.
The number on the scale means very little anyway. It's about how you feel
and look.
I intend
to arrive at my new body by my birthday, June 1. With five months to work
it, I think my plan has a serious chance for success. It helps to have
little goals to work for along the way, and little rewards too. So I'm
going to Maui again in February. That's something Jenny Craig never did
for me.
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12/14/08: Silver Bells and Christmas Pageants
One of my
sons attends a private school in Lake Oswego. We live in Northeast Portland,
so the location isn't exactly convenient. Once in a while I wonder if
I should put him in a school closer to home. But he's thriving. This weekend
I saw another example of this.
Every year
the school puts on a Christmas pageant. It's months in the making, and
for the week leading up to it, there's no academic homework so the kids
can work at home rehearsing their lines for their part of Mary, Joseph,
angel, etc. In Sam's first two years at Childrens
Hour Academy, he was in the choir, no speaking parts, so we rehearsed
the songs he needed to memorize. He was terrified. At the events themselves
he cried and trembled for the duration. I had to stand with him to keep
him from fleeing.
The following
two years Sam held his own, and I watched from the audience, incredulous
and proud.
This year
Sam, in third grade, was one of 8 Wisemen. He stood in front of the mike,
drew it closer to him when it was time to speak (much to the audience's
delight), enunciated clearly and with appropriate emphasis, and angled
it toward the next speaker when it was their turn. He showed amazing stage
presence.
When it was
time to disassemble, he gave me the obligatory hug and went off to find
his best friend. I've become superfluous, and for that I am truly grateful.
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12/12/08: Finding the Silver Lining [Part 1 of 2]
My car was
vandalized. Twice in one week. At night, under a working security light,
while I and my two angels were sleeping, a vandal walked 8 feet up my
driveway and punctured the sidewall of my right front tire. The next day
I took it to Les Schwab and bought a new tire: $140. Four nights later
the vandal did the same thing to my right rear tire. Another $140, but
even worse, I now realized it was something that could (and probably would)
happen again and again, and there was nothing I could do about it.
I reported
it to the police, and learned there's nothing THEY can do about it either.
They didn't want my punctured tires as evidence. They didn't want to send
an officer to take my sworn statement. They took my story over the phone,
and that and my $280 bought me a lovely little case number and a vague
assurance that the officer taking my information would TRY to contact
the officer who patrols my area and let him/her know what happened.
I was angry.
I was frustrated. I wanted to inflict violence. I drove in rush hour across
town to a car alarm shop called "Stop-the-Criminals-and-Blow-Their-Eardrums-Out
'R Us" (or something close to that) and found out that the only alarm
sensitive enough to detect a tire slashing would also be set off by mosquito
landings. I didn't ask around, but I'm pretty sure my neighbors would
rather I keep buying tires.
I began to
fantasize about sleeping, propped up on my porch holding a shotgun. I
seriously considered renting a Rottweiler. I thought about moving. In
a weak moment I thought about putting something sharp in my driveway that
the vandal might step on. "Booby traps are illegal," my boyfriend,
Dean, informed me. Dang.
[Part
2]
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12/11/08:
The Unbearable Lightness of Being ... Free
I recently
took a job that had great promise initially but turned out to be an oppressive,
humiliating, dark experience. At the brink of losing myself completely
to the dark side, I jumped free. Back in the sunshine, I now see with
new eyes.
Feng shui
practitioners will tell you to clear your space because you
cant bring new things into your life until you make room for them.
I finally see the absolute beauty and truth in this. While driving to
meet a friend for breakfast this morning [quick aside: you MUST do abelskivers
at HASH in Sellwood at least ONCE in your lifetime!!!], a 20-minute drive,
I got so many ideas for the future I cant possibly act on them all.
Everywhere I look is opportunity and abundance.
I had seen
in the job possibility: security, challenge, reward. When it turned out
to be none of these I felt like Id just wasted three months of my
life (except for the many wonderful human connections that will stay with
me always). I thought, What was THAT all about? What lesson am I
supposed to take away from that?!
Now I see
there were many lessons. They keep revealing themselves to me one after
the other. One was: never take a job beneath your capabilities. Another:
I have great survival instincts. And: We sometimes have to go into the
dark to truly see the light.
Free at last.
Free at last. Thank God Almighty, Im free at last!
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8/30/08:
Got Links?
It always
surprises me when one of my savvier communications friends hasnt
heard about linkedin. Its
a site where professionals can reconnect and make new connections. You
create a profile, search for folks you know, and ask to be linked. When
youre linked to them, youre also linked to their network
and their networks network and ... like that old shampoo
commercial: She tells two friends, and she tells two friends ...
Viral marketing at its finest. Facebook for the post-acne years. Enough
analogy, just go get linked.
And dont
worry: no spam has ever come to my e-mail box through linkedin. Just some
wonderful blasts from the past and some cool new connections.
Youre
welcome.
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8/22/08: Hell Always Be Timmy To Me (Happy BDay, Bro!)
One afternoon
my sister Kathy and I were playing with our favorite Christmas gift: a
mint green Easy Bake Oven. It was a miraculous thing, that oven. In addition
to being an actual appliance with hot surfaces that we could use unsupervised,
it also popped out chocolate cake in record time. We were just getting
ready to start a new batch when our mom dropped Timmy, the baby, into
my lap.
Keep an eye on your brother while I get dinner started.
We looked after her departing figure and began plotting. Timmy had just
started crawling, so we had to be able to contain him and yet still have
our hands free for baking. Finally we hatched an idea: we pulled a chair
in from the dining room and put our brother, in a cardboard box, on it.
At some point Timmy must have become curious about what we were up to.
He leaned forward and for one magnificent moment turned into Flying Box
Baby. Box Baby landed with a thud, and on the way down caught his temple
on the corner of the Easy Bake Oven. The screaming was loud, the gash
was deep, and the blood was plentiful. And the cake still had 10 minutes
to go.
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8/20/08:
Waging War Against Spam
Once in a
while you come across a FREE resource thats so good you want to
tell everyone. Thanks to PDX Synergys* newest member, Julia Stoops,
Web Designer for Blue Mouse Monkey
Designs, I now have something too good not to share.
You know
how every time your e-mail address gets posted on a Web site you get tons
of spam? Theres a great FREE
encryption program you can add to your sites that will prevent spam
bots from finding it.
You just
put in the link text, the e-mail address, hit a button, and you get a
paragraph of code you paste into your html page exactly where the e-mail
address would normally go. Julia says, I have been using this service
for years and its very reliable. Julia, where have you been
all my life? Here it is again in case you missed it the first time: Great
FREE encryption program to prevent spam
Um, and like
I said, its FREE. Cant beat that. Thanks, Julia!
*(Synergy
is my baby, my love, my networking group)
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8/13/08:
The State of Being Fat
We Americans
are eating ourselves to death. Sedentary lifestyles, stress eating, an
abundance of fast food, foodie ad bombardment, non-food foods our bodies
cant process, these are some of the reasons. But there may be another
factor. States with the highest poverty levels also have the highest levels
of obesity. Take a look at some of the fattest
states in the U.S. Mississippi and Alabama rank high; Colorado and
Hawaii rank low, corresponding to their poverty levels. Why would poverty
and obesity be linked? One reason proposed is that unhealthy food is cheap.
But so are snap peas and broccoli. Maybe the problem is a lack of education,
say some government officials. South Los Angeles, which has a higher poverty
level and a higher obesity level than other areas of L.A., has put a moratorium
on new fast food restaurants. The government is trying to save us from
ourselves. Many people think there should be more government restrictions.
Heres
what one blog entry on the subject states: Losing weight is simply
eating less and moving more. Its not the governments fault
if you cant manage those two simple things.
Pardon me
while I go for a jog.
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8/10/08:
Incandescent Fluorescent Obsolescence
Lighting
companies arent making fixtures for incandescent lights anymore.
Why? The familiar lightbulb is making way for the newer more energy efficient
compact fluorescent lights (CFLs). But at what cost to our environment?
CFLs contain mercury, sure in trace amounts, but how much additional mercury
do we WANT in our atmosphere?
Proponents
of CFLs say that it takes mercury to run the power plants to produce the
incandescents, and that CFLs contain relatively little mercury. But take
a look at the instructions for what happens when you break one: Leave
the room for 15 minutes. Use a wet rag to wipe up all pieces and liquid.
Wrap in plastic, then wrap again. Dispose as hazardous waste. Hmm.
What happens when you break an incandescent? Toss it in the garbage.
Im
all for saving energy. But we already have too much mercury in the environment.
Why are we manufacturing anything with more mercury? Not to mention the
aesthetic issue. Fluorescent bulbs, and the bug-zapper glow they emit,
are just plain ugly.
A ray of
hope is on the horizon: light-emitting diodes (LEDs). The technology is
new and expensive, but it will get better and less expensive. LEDs are
highly energy efficient and contain no mercury. I say CFLs are obsolete
already. Lets wait for LEDs to get it right, use the incandescents
until they do, and hold the mercury, please.
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8/4/08:
If It Was Easy Anyone Could Do It
Im
painting my house. Its two stories with a steeply pitched roof and
cedar shake siding. The previous owner thought a good look for the house
would be clown-makeup blue, along with several other colors on the eaves,
gutters and trim, and had it painted just before she put it on the market.
I had sold my previous house in 45 minutes and was desperate to find a
place to land, but even though the house was for sale in my neighborhood
of choice, I drove past it many times before going in because I couldnt
imagine living in a clowns house. Now, eight months later, its
becoming a sensible tan.
Most people
dont paint their own houses, I know. They hire professionals. But
I wanted to save a few grand and was looking for a summer project. Full
of optimism when the project began, I thought I could knock it out in
a weekend. Several weekends later I have become Elden, the ubiquitous
house painter from Murphy Brown who never quite finished painting
Murphys house. So far I have refused to let anyone else pick up
a paint brush. I want the feeling of accomplishment that comes from knowing
I did it myself. Juggling a paint brush and paint can while standing on
an aluminum ladder 20 feet above terra firma, Ive had moments when
I doubted my sanity. But then I remember something my dad used to say:
If it was easy, anyone could do it. The implication was that
what made it hard was exactly what made it worth doing. Im almost
done now, should be by next weekend, and I am keeping the brushes to myself.
I want my boys to remember the summer their mom painted the house. Because
she could. Because it was hard.
Updated
8/12: I finished! I finished!
see
more blog (blog
index)
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